The following are "Data Processing Definitions":
Assumed Decimal Point - Located two positions to the right of
a programmer's current salary in estimating his own
worth.
Bit - The increment by which programmers slowly go mad.
Chaining - A method of attaching programmers to desks to speed
up output.
Checkpoint - The location from which a programmer must forget
in order to be successful.
Core Storage - A receptacle for the center section of apples.
Counter - A device over which martinis are served.
Disassembler - An unattended five year old child.
Error - What someone else has made when he disagrees with your
computer output.
External Storage - A wastebasket.
Fixed Word Length - Four-letter words used by programmers in a
state of confusion.
Floating Control - A characteristic exhibited when you have to
go to the restroom but cannot leave the computer.
Floating Point - The absolute limit before floating control
is lost.
Flow Chart - A graphic representation of the fastest route to
the restroom.
Input - Food, whiskey, beer, aspirin, etc.
Macro - The last half of an expression of surprise: "Holy Macro".
Memory Dump - Amnesia.
Programmer - A red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing
with inanimate objects.